Tango

On Saturday I tried a new milonga. I had attempted to reach this venue once before, after Hurricane Irene. Roads were closed, and the detours led to more closed roads. After an hour and four phone conversations trying to get directions, I headed back home and stopped in at another friend's birthday party. This time, I wisely planned to meet other dancers at their home, and then ride in the back seat of their car.

With a GPS, the driver found the destination easily. Without a GPS, it would be nearly impossible. The building is in Sugar Loaf, NY, down a dirt road and not visible from the main street. It's a beautiful community/cultural center with artwork on the walls, and one side entirely windows. I was warmly welcomed by the host, and hugged by a dancer I haven't seen in two years. That night there were guest instructors, a well-known female instructor from NJ, Carolina Juarena, and a world champion from Columbia, Carlos Paredes. Now, to the heart of this post.

During the lesson, Carlos emphasized that the leader (usually male) needs to look at the woman (the follower), and make a connection with her. The leader's goal is to be sure the follower is comfortable during the dance. And if there is a mistake, it is not anyone's fault. Try again, keep dancing, have fun. And yet... many leaders do not seem to follow this practice and it seems a shame. I had one dance that night that turned out to be unnecessarily stressful as I attempted to follow leads into tricky steps with a man I did not know while dancing in close embrace. Many tango dancers would blame the leader in this situation, with the argument that if he leads correctly, I will be able to follow. True enough. But why even create a situation where the dance is ruined?

A possible answer may be the marked contrast between the way professionals dance vs. the "average" non-professional dancers (most of us!). In Argentina, my instructor regularly reminded his students that professional stunts belonged on the stage, not on a social dance floor. Maybe it's too difficult to resist the fantasy of looking as good as the pro's.

http://www.carolinadancer.com/